🎨 How to Love Yourself More Than Your Consulting Career?

Newsletter inspired by this post from a friend of mine, Julie Hannel 💛

At a Glance:

• What does loving yourself mean?
• My top tips for building discipline
• A 30-day challenge for you

A couple of days ago, I saw my friend’s post on LinkedIn…

The quote she shared there:

Discipline is the highest form of self-love.

— Kierra C.T. Banks

…perfectly reflects me.This made me reflect on my discipline…

I simply think I love myself a lot, and I’m very proud of that (no matter what others think about it). My discipline has always been very high, which is a great proof of that love.

Loving yourself means doing the things that align with your best interests, even when it’s difficult. Discipline isn’t about punishment; it’s about commitment to yourself and your goals. That’s the purest form of self-love.

I think this is a big reason why things are going so well for me in many areas. I have always liked myself. I was okay with the way I was, I’ve never doubted myself. I knew I was a top performer and I could achieve whatever I wanted.

Success is a result of tiny daily actions. Tiny daily actions come from discipline. So success is discipline, and discipline is self-love.

Think of discipline as a compass. Each small, disciplined action is a step in the direction of your true north—what makes you happy and fulfilled. Without it, you risk getting lost in the demands of others.

How does this connect with consulting and the corporate world?

A lot!

In consulting, it’s easy to let work take over your life. But I realized that loving myself meant saying 'no' to sacrificing my health, happiness, or personal dreams for a corporate agenda. My discipline in prioritizing myself gave me the courage to make decisions that supported my well-being.

In the corporate world, it's easy to confuse working hard with self-worth. But true self-love is about setting boundaries and using discipline to protect your time and energy for what truly matters. This mindset shift can be the first step to breaking free from the 'golden cage.

For consultants, loving yourself could mean setting a strict rule to stop checking emails after 7 PM or prioritizing a weekly workout over an extra client call. These small acts of discipline are declarations of self-love because they prioritize your well-being over external demands.

We see how much people earn by looking at their houses and cars.We see how well-known they are by looking at who they are friends with.We see how respected they are by looking at their position in the company.

But what we don’t see is how many times people failed.What we don’t see is how people fail in their private lives.What we don’t see is how successful corporate top performers fail in their private lives.

So, what’s my advice?

Love yourself—this is key. And be the most disciplined towards yourself.

This means:

• You should be your priority, not that client call.
• You should focus on what matters to you, not to your manager.
• You should do what you love, not what people tell you to do.

Whatever this means for you, make some decisions and be disciplined about them.Take that first step and make a change in your life. Start doing something for yourself. Be disciplined. Love yourself.

How to Stay Disciplined?

Tip 1: Accountability Towards Another Person

Discipline thrives on accountability. When someone is counting on you, showing up becomes non-negotiable.

This can work with workouts and exercising. It worked perfectly for me.I’ve been training 2–3 times a week with a personal trainer for over 8 years, and only once did I send him a text in the morning saying I couldn’t make it to training because I wasn’t feeling well. The accountability towards the other person (he woke up early, he would be there) helped my discipline and ensured I showed up every time for those 8 years (except that one day).

Tip 2: Celebration or a Big Prize

Reward yourself! Pair your goals with a prize that excites you to stay motivated and disciplined.

This year, I have ambitious workout goals, and to motivate myself even more, I set a big prize for myself. I will get a whole new wardrobe, put aside money for it, and I cannot wait to make my goal a reality.

Small celebrations also work!

Celebrate every win, big or small. Recognizing daily successes keeps you motivated and positive.

How can you do this?Sit down and make a list of your celebration rituals for big achievements, medium ones, and small things.

Tip 3: Find a Source of Your ‘Validation’

Validation fuels motivation. Whether it’s a habit tracker or a mentor’s encouragement, find what makes you feel proud.

Validation can take many forms. Here are some ideas:

• Create a tracker to cross out days when you were disciplined in an area.(This works very well for me. I track exercise routines, reading, learning Spanish, cold showers, 10k steps, etc. Seeing a page full of completed habits makes me proud.)
• Set reminders on your phone to keep yourself accountable.(I set up reminders 3 times a day to do a 2–3 minute mini exercise routine. Seeing a red dot on my iPhone makes me want to remove it—but I can’t until I do the exercises!)
• Join a community and do things in a group.(This works for me in terms of business goals. Building alongside others inspires and motivates me.)
• Find an accountability partner and be responsible to them.
• Find a mentor or inspiring person to connect with.(My mentor inspires me to achieve more. Being able to share my successes with her is incredibly validating.)

Tip 4: Create Small Habits

Big changes start small. Build discipline by committing to a tiny habit you can’t fail at—and grow from there.

For example:Want to read more? Start with 2 pages a day, then increase gradually. Just 1% better daily adds up fast.

Tip 5: Test Systems and Iterate

Systems make discipline sustainable. By automating routines, you can focus your energy where it matters most. Systems make discipline easier by replacing guesswork with a clear guide.

Advice from Steve Chandler in The Power of Systems resonates with me:

“Rather than dreaming of something happening,why not create a system structured to make the result happen?Then follow the system, whether you feel like it or not. Let the system guide the momentum.

Steps to Create Systems (according to Steve Chandler):

Step 1. What system you currently use (whether consciously or not)? (Make it conscious!)

Step 2. What system would work better?

Tip 6: Go Deeper Into Your Values

If discipline is self-love, what better way to love yourself than building discipline around your values?

Start with what you deeply care about, and discipline will become easier.Make sure to assess your values first, then think about what you can do to build discipline that cultivates them.

Challenge for You:

Pick one area where you want to build discipline linked to your values and well-being (not your employer’s!).

Then pick one way of building discipline and focus on being consistent for 30 days.

Taking the first step can feel scary, especially when you’re used to putting everyone else’s needs before your own. But remember, every small effort counts. Even if it’s imperfect, it’s progress.

No matter where you’re starting from, you have the power to make small changes that lead to big results. Be patient with yourself—you’re worth the effort, and the rewards are waiting for you.

Let me know the results!